The Bristol Sauce manifesto & how to write a restaurant review
It's always worth checking a chef's criminal record
Since I declared my intentions to open this platform to other writers, I have had a host of people keen to write for me. This is something that I am most proud of.
As the captain of this ship I must make sure that we are familiar with the vessel and sailing in the same direction.
So, a manifesto.
The Bristol Sauce will be a home for great food and great writing. We will shout from the rooftops (write emails) about great food, whether it is a kebab on Stapleton Road or a French bistro in Clifton. In order to write honestly about great food, we will also have to declare when things are not as they should be. We think that this mix of honest writing is important for readers, but also connects people with and supports a healthy local independent food scene.
We are based in Bristol, but we will occasionally cover subjects or restaurants in nearby areas to add a little extra spice to the mix.
As well as exploring Bristol’s restaurant scene, we intend to use food as a lens with which to look at culture, religion, sustainability and history. We are first and foremost a platform for writing, but in the future we hope to speak with you on podcasts, meet you at events and help you find great places to eat with an app.
We will always pay in full for anything we write about. We will always be honest and fair.
We hope you’ll consider becoming a Saucer, if you’re not one already, and join our club of the most-informed eaters in Bristol.
How to write a restaurant review (The Bristol Sauce code and style guide)
Starters
Book a table but don’t let them know who you are or why you are visiting.
Take someone with you. The more of the menu you can try, the more you’ll understand the restaurant and be able to assess it.
Do your research. Has this restaurant been reviewed by anyone else? How long has it been open, where else has the chef worked, is there anything novel about it?
The main course
Avoid the restaurant realising you are writing about them while you are there. Notebooks on tables is not a thing. If you wish to take notes, get familiar with the notes app on your phone.
Always take a picture of the menu. You’ll need it later.
Take landscape pictures of the following:
The outside of the restaurant
The inside of the restaurant (it is wise to do these two after you have eaten)
Every dish
Anything else particularly relevant
Take a couple of nice portrait photos too - we will use them for socials.
Order what the restaurant is known for and ask the staff for recommendations. We always go in with the intention of reviewing a place well, so we want to eat the dishes they are most proud of.
Always, always, always go out of your way to be kind and polite to staff. Tip 10 per cent as standard.
Pay attention to how other tables are being treated. Are they receiving the same service as you?
When you visit a restaurant to review, enjoy it but you have to be alert from the moment you walk through the door to the moment you leave. Everything matters, details are what brings a review to life - Andy Lynes, author of Smashed
Speak to the staff and the chef if you can. What extra tidbit of information can you find out that will add context to your review or enlighten our readers? What was the chef doing before this? What is their vision, their raison d’etre?
Dessert
Now it’s time to write.
The first bite of a dish is with the eyes, the first taste of a restaurant review is an engaging, funny or insightful first sentence. Grab your readers by the eyeballs and don’t let them go.
Here are some excellent first lines:
‘Convicted burglar Gino D’Acampo has opened a restaurant in Birmingham’ - Meat & One Veg blog, 2019
‘Snoring is like stupidity: you don’t know you’re a sufferer until someone points it out’ - The Plate Licked Clean, 2022
‘To be a veteran Londoner is to be reflexively befuddled by Canary Wharf; a surveilled, corporate theme park that transforms, at the weekend, into a culturally barren ghost town of shuttered Prets, bored families looking at massive fountains, and bodycam-wearing security guards’ - Jimi Famurewa, 2024
‘This whole thing about how often men think about the Roman Empire is actually small potatoes when compared to their plans and strategies concerning The End Times’ - Bald Flavours, 2024
‘For me, it all began with a pie.’ - Georgina Pellant, 2024
What do these first lines tell us? That we can start in the middle or with something seemingly totally unrelated; as long as it’s entertaining and you eventually link it back. They also suggest it’s always worth checking a chef’s criminal record.
Give the reader a sense of time and place. My brother parodies a local bloggers output as'I went here and here is a picture and I ate this and here is a picture and it was nice and here is a picture and it was nice' so for me it's about taking them to the table with you. Make them feel they're sitting with you, as an experience, rather than just listing what you ate and what you thought as some trudge through a menu - Plate Licked Clean
A bad restaurant review is an extended menu; a list of things the reviewer ate with an uninspiring adjective-ridden tail. A good restaurant review tells a story and invites in context or reference from the world beyond just the food that is on the table.
Take this one I wrote about Little Shop & Pantry on the eve of the Euro’s final. Or the review I wrote about a pop-up at Root, which made considerable reference to Jay Rayner’s review in the Guardian the same week. I like a theme that carries through a review, but it’s not compulsory.
Aim loosely for 800 words. If you want a challenge, go for 600. If it warrants it, you can have 1,000.
Clarity is king - never ever sacrifice ease of understanding for what you might think is a clever turn of phrase or poetic expression, your reader won't thank you for it - Andy Lynes, Smashed
Put the price in brackets (£10) after every dish that you ordered. Avoid making the review about the price - people will read it from different backgrounds with different financial situations. What is cheap to one person will be expensive to another.
Sometimes if you don’t like a place, it’s because you’re not the target audience. Bear that in mind - just because you don’t like it - someone else might.
That said - be honest. Honesty and integrity is the only thing that sets us apart and makes us trustworthy. If it’s bad, you can say it’s bad.
Notes about style
Making up words, in the right context, is encouraged. You can start sentences with and. And because. Because The Bristol Sauce is a place where we are helped along by grammatical rules, not caged by them.
The following words/phrases are banned:
Iconic
Hidden gem
Brizzle
Gert lush
Palate and palette are not the same. Approach with caution.
Avoid over use of exclamation marks! One per review only!
You can swear, but just consider whether you really fucking need to.
For how to spell, what to capitalise, appropriate use of grammar and other interesting style notes please consult the excellent and exhaustive Guardian style guide.
Petit Fours
The best thing you can do to improve your writing is a) write and b) read.
Read all the critics religiously every week at least twice. The first time for enjoyment the second and subsequent times to analyse the overall structure and use of language, style and rhythm. Decide what you love and what you hate about the writing. That process will teach you pretty much everything you need to know about writing a restaurant review and your own voice will emerge from knowing your own preferences - Andy Lynes, Smashed
I’d recommend reading Table Talk by AA Gill, any review by Marina O’Loughlin and Wasted Calories and Ruined Nights by Jay Rayner. I also really enjoyed Comfort Eating by Grace Dent. And anything by M.K Fisher.
The Full English, The Sporkful and the radio four food programme are all excellent listening.
If you have recommendations for more books or podcasts, or indeed tips for writing a restaurant review - I’d love to hear them. Please leave us a comment below.
Now go forth and eat!
All words and photos by Meg Houghton-Gilmour, unless otherwise stated
Read next:
The importance of food writing & an exciting update from Just Meg
The first fine dining restaurant to appear in America was Delmonico’s in 1827. The first restaurant review to appear in the New York Times was a review of Delmonico’s, some twenty years later. Astoundingly, thanks to the magic of the internet and dedicated archivists, you can read it
Off Menu is a good podcast, I doubt it will help you write a restaurant review but it’s very funny!